Nonhuman

I destroy everything I touch, call me the destroyer

I might kill someone one day too, call me the killer

I smile and laugh with everything I have everytime

Because that's everything I have left after all this time.

All I am is pent up regrets and dissatisfactions, anger too

And in my eyes you see nothing, they deceive you

I'm a creature born out of love and lust, but mutated

I'm now a creature mutated by hate that I created.

I'm not a human, I'm something I've yet to discover

But I'm not human, I knew that after thinking it over...

I'm despicable, I hate my fucking self, I'm disgusting

I always knew this, even if I was happy, I was rusting.

Here I am, hating myself, hoping for change, striving for it

And I'm changing the nonhuman I am, bit by bit

I'm seeing a brighter future because today I can

I'm walking forward for the first time, with no plan.

Constientizare...

Se tineau de mana intr-un spatiu static, timpul se oprea
Din cand in cand atat pentru el cat si pentru ea
Aveau incercari nenumarate, inutile, de sincronizare
Finalul povestii era scris, aparitie fara avertizare...

Ce doare mai tare? sa crezi ca totul e ideal, fara egal
Sau sa stii ca te indrepti inevitabil spre final?
Mai poti zambi, bucuria te mai binecuvanteaza?
Sau teama si tristetea vin si te acapareaza?

Milioanele de intrebari rostite parca nu isi aveau rostul
Nu mai era dragoste, iar asta pentru ei era costul
Mila din privirile lor era mult prea aparenta,
Incet, ii cutremura linistea atat de evidenta.

Inca se tineau de mana, amanau din greu momentul
Ceva inca ii lega, nu stiau ce, ciudat sentimentul
Dar ca si o poveste bine scrisa, finalul e realist
In lumea noastra, nu e loc de gand idealist.

"Ramanem prieteni."
"Cu siguranta."

Si cu aceste cuvinte mincinoase, ei doi erau din nou
Unul fara celalalt, definitiv, plecand pe un drum nou
Nestiind cu siguranta daca au facut alegerea corecta
Insa cu certitudinea ca viata nu e mereu perfecta,

Fling

Soapte dulci rostite intr-o noapte.
El in genunchi, ea pe coate,
Se misca natural, inflacarati,
Gem incet, de placere, asudati.

Lumina scazuta intensifica focul.
Dorinta lor conduce jocul;
Insa jocul nu e pentru copii,
E pasiune adevarat, fara prostii.

Printre saruturi, printre spasme,
Au terminat jocul prin orgasme.
Converseaza fara cuvinte, din priviri
Ai zice ca e inceputul unei iubiri.

Insa a fost doar o aventura de o noapte
Numele nu le-a fost rostit printre soapte.
Amandoi vor pleca cu o amintire frumoasa
Soarta ii va conduce ori in viitor, ori acasa.

There...

Sitting on a bench with a clear blue sky over my head
There's a tingling sensation, my feet get rid of the lead
That resided within them for so long, they were mine again
And they started moving on their own, I can't explain.

They were carrying me towards a known destination
A place that I remembered dearly even after separation
It was there that I grew up, there I laughed and cried
There was my home, and we've been forever tied.

I still laugh with much pleasure, I remember everything
Now I understand that I left over there, something
A big part of me, or small, maybe that's why I'm not tall
Anyway, wherever I may go, I shan't forget it at all.

My happiness, if it may ever hit me, there it began
There I realized everything, that sometimes I can
And sometimes I can't but I'll never forget it,my birthplace
It may be bad and decrepit, but in my heart it has a special place.

Ciudat

Scriu pe foaie goala randuri fara sens,
Imi apar cuvinte ce nu le deslusesc,
Pentru mine si eu sunt un mister...
Pot fi si in Iad, pot fi si in cer..

Nu am cerut nimanui sa ma inteleaga,
Nici eu nu stiu cine sunt, ce voi fi, draga...
Ma invart in 300 de locuri ascunse in minte,
Si culeg de acolo mii si mii de cuvinte.

Acum nu imi ramane decat sarcina de a le pune impreuna,
Am in mine un puzzle, 80% nerezolvat, restul o gluma,
Pulberi de sperante spulberate calatoresc, cautand casa
Si se plimba si se plimba, spera, o speranta falsa.

Salut

Un calduros salut pentru draga mea audienta,

Sper ca nu v-a lipsit a mea prezenta,

Apar in fata voastra din nou sa va declar

Ca vin si plec, pentru mine nu e clar...

Spun asta cu o mica mare plecaciune, iertare,

Dar cum am mai declarat deja destul de tare,

Nu e clar nimic pentru mine, e cetos, e opac

Ma simt la fel ca si cum as juca fara pistol pac-pac...

Off, am atatea de spus, de povestit (minciuna)

Mi-a fost dor de voi foarte mult (asta-i buna)

Sper sa ne mai intalnim odata (nu chiar)

Asta e numarul meu (l-am luat din ziar).

Si inca odata va salut cu respectul ce vi se cuvine,

Nu stiu daca mai apar, depinde de cheful din mine,

Zambetul meu e amar, nu mai vad, toti dispar,

As fi vrut sa imi pese, un minut macar...

In treacat

Am trecut unul pe langa altul, cand alta data...
Stateam umar la umar, zambind la poza laolalta.
Si imi amintesc zilele cand chiar credeam ce se zicea
Ca vom fi prieteni pe vecie, colegi, ca lumea!!

Dar minciuni au fost rostite,
Acum dor ca niste cutite.
Eu sunt ok, sunt obisnuit, am pielea mai tare..
Dar ei sau ele, sufera, sau mi se pare?

Sunt dezamagiti de tine,
Nu le pare bine
Ca i-ai uitat asa de repede, cand promiteai,
Ca prieteni mai buni ca ei nu gaseai.

Dar timpul trece, lumea se schimba, si tu te-ai schimbat
Cu siguranta ai uitat de unde si cu cine ai plecat..
Dar cine sunt eu sa iti mai tin morala? lasa
Am fost doar pentru putin, colegi de clasa.

It's been a while

Hey baby girl, long time no see...
Tell me, did you enjoy the sea?
I sure loved the feeling of you gone,
Taking small steps one by one...

I saw that house, once more
It was the closest to the shore
Do you remember?
It was December...

I walked through it again, alone
It's not the same, it has grown...
I had all that room to myself,
I saw the card we put on the shelf...

Everything seems so big, it awaits me
You remember, I said I'm gonna be...
Forget it, you're in the same room as I was,
Yet it's not small; you defy its laws.

The world is so big, I can't see the end of it
I still remember that candle, which you lit..
It gave us warmth, safety and light,
I was unaware you wished to fight.

And end it so soon;
I played it too cool...
The world is too big, I still wish it was gone..
And you.... you went there with another one.